Kerrvert Humor

NanciNetters bring their razor-sharp wits to bear


Debra L Meyer (dmeyer@tenet.edu)
You know you're a Kerrvert when...

.......You count all the dead deer, possum, armadillo,golden retrievers and frogs on the highway back down I-10 and blame them on Eric Hay....

..... you stall inside the ampitheatre after the afternoon show as long as humanly possiblein order to stake out great seats for Nanci's show, until threats of National Guard action drive you , pouting, outside the gates to wait with the rest of her fans...

...you see males wearing broomstick skirts without the benefit of bloomers underneath and it doesn't even make you look more than 4 times...

.....you risk being "seriously jostled" in ugly moo-ing crowd incident waiting in line for the gates to open, the threat of Birkenstock treadmarks on your back gnawing on your sleep-deprived mind....

....You want to run away to Mother Russia and join a band of "redgrass" musicians....

....you have to have sunglasses just to sit around the campfire because of the beaming smiles of fellow NanciNetters and the threat of getting "flashed" by David Grant....

....you are still wearing the plastic bracelet days after you return from the concert....

....you use the pit potties and think " not too bad, at least there's no daddy longlegs in here" and you stop holding your breath because it isn't as bad as those state park outhouses in your childhood used to be...

.... you and your tentmate awaken simultaneously with a unanimous "RAIN!!!" and begin madly zipping tent flaps, only to awaken simultaneously a few hours later with the unified gasp of "HEAT!" and begin madly unzipping tentflaps.....

.... you take those cold showers in the open air and think about getting an allover tan, lauching at the irony of the admonition to conserve water, like you were going to linger in there or something....

...you resolve to win that guitar raffle so you can at least have something to carry around like everyone else has...

...you stop drop-jawing when childhood heroes like Peter Yarrow show up mere yards away...

...you have a cold beer delivered to you while you wait in line just because you smiled and waved at someone...else...!

...you resolve to become a member of "Camp Sweetness and Light (Beware of the Dog)" because they have the best shade....

... you fall asleep standing up at a campfire at 4 am and still hate to turn in...

....you use binoculars to see what brand of tennis shoes Nanci is wearing onstage...

...you stop by the used CD stores in San Antonio before you even have a shower in order to pillage the folk music in their selection for a cd you always wanted, all your life!...

....you begin planning the "Kerrville Karoke" music video...

...you want Jamie and Andrew Bollich to adopt you because they are such a sweet couple and Jamie looks a little bit like Nanci...

....you get to play a washtub bass and it becomes your proudest moment since winning the spelling bee in 3rd grade...

... the first person you ask directions from in the dark campgrounds gives you a huge long hug and says "Welcome Home"..

...you notice the abundance of wildflowers on the highway and hope Susan Peete got her fill of flowers even without bluebonnets....

... you want to adopt Sara Huzinga because she is so dang cute and plays Nanci songs and she has a wandering spirit...

...you feel like you've known Dawn-Marie Heckleman and Sherry Toatman ever since junior high when you all were at church camp together...

....you watch Mike Cogliandro sketch the performers from his seat in the front row and realize what an eye for detail he has when his posts describe things you forgot about. ( You ought to be a journalist, Mike!)...

...You wish you'd had Chuck Duffield's nice sons in your class when they were younger. Thanks, Patrick, for helping me set up my tent in that wind!..

...You persuade Mark Ferguson to stay HOURS after his departure schedule just so you can hear him and John jamming on their guitars...

...you open your ice chest after Eric Hay leaves and find goodies he secretly stashed when you weren't looking...

...you want to be part of every Schrull family reunion because they are the nicest folks!...

... you wish you used a Mac so you'd get a chance to read Shelly Brisbi's information in MacUser....

...you ignore the book you brought to read because its so much fun talking to Madison Searle's kids Ben( who seemed astounded that *I* like Nanci Griffith too) and Emily (looks like the Littlest Angel in her nanci.com tee shirt to her knees)...

You know you are a Kerrvert if you decide to return the next weekend and you thank the stars above that you live in TEXAS!

Deb "trying not to rub it in too much but just cain't hep mahseff and stop calling me Debra, Mike" Meyer


A few Kerrverts had a reunion less than a week after the festival. Here's David Grant to tell you more.

David Grant (dgrant@eden.com)

 

We came up with the definitive warning signs that you are experiencing Kerrville withdrawal. If you are experiencing either of these symptoms, you probably need a Shiner Bock and a bed. If you are experiencing *both* symptoms, you might need professional help...

1) You find yourself asleep during the day

2) When not asleep, you are talking nonstop about Kerrville (usually to people who don't care/understand)

If anyone can come up with a cure, please post it as soon as possible (notice that it's 2:00 a.m. and I'm still going strong). Please.


Rob.Gowin@amd.com (Rob Gowin)

Well, by the symptoms listed by David, I'm definately gone into Kerrville withdrawl. Here's how it's affected me. :-)

1. You wake up to the sound of the DJ on the local PBS radio station talking about Kerrville (on 'Folkways'), and hope for a fraction of a second that you're still there.

2. Shortly after that, while brushing your teeth, you think the there should be about a dozen more people here crowding for sink space.

3. You're hoping that 'Folkways' will play some Tom Prasada-Rao.

4. You're singing 'I Wish it Would Rain' in the shower and everywhere else.

5. When it does rain, your first thought is about the heat relief it must be providing to those folks you know who are still at Kerrville, and how you wish you could be dancing in the rain with them...

6. You seriously consider packing up and flying to Kentucky in hopes of re-creating part of the magic.

7. "Tecumseh Valley" is playing, and you've lost yourself in imagining that you're back in the Amphitheatre at Kerrville. At least until the guy behind you honks you back to reality.

8. You swear you hear "I am a child of the _nineties_" when listing to "It's a Hard Life."


Return to:Kerrville Remembered or The Blue Moon Page

These pages are copyright© 1997 by Shelly Brisbin Words and images created by others are reproduced with permission of the authors, and credited herein.